Is my boss deaf?

It can be extremely difficult to deal with a boss who is shutting you out or does not want to listen to your ideas.

They may;

1. Exclude you from crucial meetings,
2. Stop answering or deflect your questions,
3. Disparage your input, and/or
4. Ignore your needs for resources or other support.

There may be a number of reasons why your boss is taking these actions, but to be honest, there is no excuse.

The reasons fall into two core categories,

1. Intentional
2. Unintentional

Some of the intentional reasons could include

1. They do not know the answer
2. They do not know how to deal with the issue
3. They use this as a form of control
4. Fear

The unintentional reasons could include

1. Their workload has increased
2. They are under immense pressure
3. They may be out of their depth
4. It is just your perception
5. Poor communication skills
6. Poor leadership skills

No matter what the reason, we all have a responsibility to address the issue and work to a resolution. We all play an important part in quality relationships, and it is usually never one sided.

Here are some things to consider when trying to repair the relationship with your boss.

1. Firstly understand that no news sometimes means good news so it may not be a problem if they are not engaging with you as much as usual.
2. It may only be your perception and in fact nothing has changed.
3. You may in fact be treated the same as others are.

Some suggested solutions could include.

1. Take the lead and speak with your boss about your feelings.
2. Schedule a time to meet with your boss with a shared agenda so they can prepare accordingly.
3. Review and reflect on what made the relationship so good in the first place and ensure these factors are still in place.
4. Demonstrate to your boss that you value them and their leadership.
5. Do not accept defeat – Be creative and look for opportunities to build new alliances with other colleagues to accomplish more than you could on your own.
6. Look for ways to indirectly repair the relationship with your boss.
7. Listen to your boss both with your ears and your eyes. See what they are telling you indirectly and manage accordingly.

The key is to nib it in the bud as early as possible. The sooner you can address the issue the easier it will be to overcome.

Nothing beats a quality conversation to resolve any issue.

In the unlikely event that the matter cannot be resolved, then my key advice is to not spend all your energy focusing on that relationship.

You have two options;

1. Concentrate on how you can contribute to the company in other ways without the need for your boss’s direct acceptance.
2. Exit the company in an attempt to find a better boss.

Ultimately the choice is yours – You decide what is best for you, your career and your wellbeing.